5 Ways to Invest in your Toddler's Spiritual Development

We love God with our complete selves: heart, mind, and soul...and we love our babies the same way!  It's never too early to begin investing in your child's spiritual development, here's 5 simple ways to help your very young child develop a solid understanding of their loving creator.  

#1 Invest in yourself.

Mamas, seriously.  I get it.  Some days if I have fed my kids 3 meals and give them a bath I am doing a victory dance down the hallway after putting them in bed.  In the chaos of raising toddlers, you get to choose what is non-negotiable (and it's a short list).  

Developing a deeper connection with God doesn't have to be a lofty or impossible goal.  The benefits of even a small investment of time and focus on your own spiritual journey could surprise you as you see it instill a sense of joy and peace in your day, soften your temper with your little loves, and change your heart toward your marriage.  It's the best investment you could make in your life let alone your family's lives. Your kids primary understanding of God and what following Him looks like may come from you, so don't be ashamed to take time to be the woman you want to be.

Spiritual fuel for busy moms: 

• Give God 30, 42, or 90 days to show you how walking with Him daily can transform your journey of motherhood. 
• Listen to Christian Music in the car to keep you sane and positive, and even spark moments of spontaneous worship or prayer.    
• Install a devotional app (or two...or an entire Bible) on your phone and when you have that rare free moment, take the chance to read something inspirational.  
• Think of some of the negative things that you were surrounded by in your home as a child (body image confusion, addiction, affairs, divorce, anger...) You have been given the amazing opportunity to introduce your kids to God in your own (still imperfect) environment.  Consider counseling or Breaking Free if there are bad habits or attitudes whose cycle you want to break.
• Watch John Ortberg's "A Jesus Way of Life" (while folding laundry, or whatever) and move your mindset from "big time commitment" to "intuitive relationship". 

#2 Make prayer normal.

We make a BIG effort in our house to have prayer be authentic and not ritualistic.  Prayer is part of an open ended conversation with God, knowing He is always close and always listening. For example, here's a sunset from our walk the other evening.  We responded to the beauty with a simple prayer: "Wow!  Look at that sunset!  God is such an amazing artist.  He put those colors together just so we could enjoy them and to remind us that He is here with us even on our walk.  Thank you God, for this beautiful sunset!" 

I try to make prayer super normal, and part of every day.  I pray aloud and let my kiddos hear how I talk to God- whether it's a thought of praise, a plea for a friend, or even when I have to apologize for losing my temper.  Modeling repentance and making sincere apologies to our children when warranted is priceless, it's the best possible way to demonstrate the value of a humble heart, what "sorry" looks like in the real world, and live authentically together.  

Just before bedtime, my daughter LOVES her "Prayer Sticks".  They are simple little prayer prompts.  On one side I write: Please, Thank You, or Wow (Stolen from Anne Lamott).  On the other side I write a little prompt.  For example "Thank You" on one side and on the flip side "...for one of my favorite things".  My daughter pulled that stick tonight.  My husband read it aloud and shared one of his favorite things and then modeled a one line thank you prayer.  She said her favorite thing was her toys, so she prayed "Thank you God for my toys". 

Some Prayer Stick Ideas: 

• Thank You: For a favorite thing, for my family, for a friend, for something I am excited about, for a food I like, for something that happened today, for someone that was kind to me, etc.
• Please: Help someone I care about, help me learn new things, give my friends sweet dreams, etc.
• Wow: God, you make beautiful things! God loves me so much! etc.

#3 Make truth a part of everyday.

Try to integrate truth and wisdom throughout the day, being careful not to isolate God to Bible reading time.  You might remind your child that God designed us to need rest at nap time or when noticing a squirrel eating on a walk you might remember that God is the one who makes sure that even the animals have enough food.

When you are reading Bible stories to your kiddos, connect the story or the verse to real life.  Use it as an opportunity to learn something about God or about yourself in every encounter, not just a fun fairy tale or point of knowledge.  There are two REALLY good children's Bibles that basically do all of the hard work around thinking that through for you: The Story for Little Ones is perfect for toddlers (My daughter enjoyed it even at 18 months old) and The Jesus Storybook Bible is beautifully written and illustrated for the 4+ crowd.

Of course my kid's favorite Bible that they BEG to "read" is an app for tablets and phones.  Really fun way to engage their imaginations and a great alternative to other computer games (keeping screen time in moderation, of course).

Kid's (and moms) also love music!  Worship music has a lot of truth and peace to offer.  Make a great Pandora station for the afternoons and take time to sing God's love as lullabies at night.  Your child may memorize a song like "Jesus Loves Me" long before they can memorize a Bible verse.  Even if you aren't the best singer, the words and melody can soothe their tiny souls.

More favorite books for introducing little ones to God and the Bible:

ABC Bible Verse Book
God Loves You!

Just in Case You Ever Wonder or You are Special by Max Lucado

If Jesus Lived Inside my Heart 

God Gave us You

#4 Community is SO important.

I knooooooow it's tough to get out of the house, someone is always too sick to go in to the nursery and family time on the weekends (or anytime) is SO precious.  Going to church is a big deal, though.  The Christian life is not meant to be lived in isolation.  If you don't make going to church a priority, it's less likely that your kids will be excited about the habit as they get older.  You need more people pouring spiritual truth, life, and perspective into your kids than just you.  And YOU need the re-charge too!  If your church is not a place that you can connect with God in worship, be encouraged, challenged, and serve as a family it may be worth your time to find a healthy community that is the right fit.  

Consider finding a local MOPs, BSF or other women's Bible Study with child care.  Especially if you are taking on the role of spiritual mentor in your home with little support, you need a loving "village" for yourself and your kiddos.  You'll get the chance to have a morning with adult conversation, spiritual enrichment, and hopefully make a few friends that are good for the soul.

#5 Don't overspiritualize or idealize "spirituality".

Give yourself a little credit, girl.  You are already laying a foundation for your child's future relationship with God. Are you teaching your toddler about waiting and patience?  Are you helping your child think through the effects of their actions and make good choices? Are you taking opportunities to show your child how to be kind to others?  Do you model "I'm sorry" and "I forgive you"?  Are integrity, priorities, and character important in your family?  These are all things that will benefit your child in their future life journey with God (and lessons we all need to revisit from time to time).

It's beautiful, and a gift of a calling to be able to invest in our sweet babies spiritual foundation.  Just remember, it's our job to love, teach, model, and nurture but it's God who will ultimately capture their hearts.  They have a choice, He has a plan, and we have less control than we wish we did.  Once we train our loves, we eventually have to let go and entrust their hearts to God.

I don't teach my two year old her ABCs as a way of putting pressure on her to attend an ivy league college, and in the same way I don't pray with my kids so that they will grow up to go to seminary.  I am simply building spiritual capability the same way I invest in their academic capability. I can honestly say I will FOREVER-ever-ever love my babies no matter what.  It's important to me that they know that my love for them is not contingent on their love for Jesus.  It's unconditional, baby.  Full of grace, forgiveness, love, and tons of prayer. 

Can I pray for you?  Just for a quick moment?

God, from heaven you are looking down on us mamas.  You entrusted these beautiful, eternal souls to our care.  We love them, we love you.  God speak to us your truth. Help us to walk confidently and bravely as we try tirelessly and imperfectly to show our kids how AWESOME you are.  Come into our messy houses.  Show US your awesomeness.  As our sweet babies grow older do not ever ever stop pursuing their hearts, we know your love is steadfast and powerful.  We want your love to overtake us and give us strength for this day, and to help us not to worry about tomorrow.  Teach us the security of surrender and the peace of trust.  Help us to be the mother, the wife, the woman you designed us to be so that we can have the joy of living in full freedom.  Amen.

LOVE YOU, MAMAS!  My prayers are with you.

BONUS: More Great Parent Resources to Check Out

Grace Based Parenting

Sticky Faith: Everyday ideas to build Lasting Faith in your Kids

Love and Logic for Preschoolers

Surviving a Spiritual Mismatch in Marriage

Unglued: Making Wise Choices in the Midst of Raw Emotions

Do you have other favorite resources, activities or tips?  Share them in the comments!

What holding back REALLY holds back

I leaned over Olivia's shoulder as we colored together and beamed "Oh wow, Olivia.  I LOVE the colors you chose!  Your picture is beautiful!"

She turned her head up at me, covered her picture with her arm and defensively barked "Not for you, mommy!"

I think I would have been annoyed or angry if I hadn't been so hurt.

I wasn't asking for her picture.

I gave her the markers and paper.

She was sitting at my table, during the time I had set aside to spend with her to co-create art.

Seeing her weak, skinny arm trying to hold something back that I wanted to share with her stung me.

I laughed about it with my husband last night, because when things are funny they hurt less.  And I mean, "Not for you, mommy!" was kind of hilarious.  Seriously, child.  You have nothing that I do not give you, and mostly at great sacrifice to myself (that pedicure budget is pretty sad these days).

It finally hit me this morning.

God gave me everything I have.  He could take or demand it at any moment, but he desires to co-create with me.  He gave me my talents and gifts, not so that I could produce results to please Him, but so that He and I could go together into this dark world and shine light and love.  How silly for me to hold on to areas of my life where I use my gifts or He has clearly blessed me and say, "Not for you, Daddy!"  Not only is it hurtful, but I miss out on a HUGE opportunity to spend beautiful time accomplishing great things with Him.

I'm sure we all hold on to different things more tightly.  The last couple of years that I have spent at home with my kids often leaves me dreaming of returning to my career.  The things that make me great at work are the ways that God has uniquely designed and gifted me.  I was one of the lucky ones who actually found a job that engaged those passions and strengths of who I am.  In truth, those same gifts make me effective for other ways God wants to partner with me to love people- and I should be more thrilled about that than PowerPoint.

So today I choose to say, "It's for you, Daddy!".  Thanks for joining me in my day. Thank you for creating this home and family alongside me.  Help me to hear your affirmations and gentle guidance.  Make me aware and thankful that everything I touch, see, have, and am is a gift from you.  Give me joy in painting a small corner of the beautiful story you are telling today, knowing that the big picture is as awesome as you are even if I can't see it past the green playdoh ground into my carpet.

1 Peter 4:10
As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another,as good stewards of God's varied grace:

Proverbs 8:27-30
When he established the heavens, I was there;
when he drew a circle on the face of the deep,
when he made firm the skies above,
when he established the fountains of the deep,
when he assigned to the sea its limit,
so that the waters might not transgress his command,
when he marked out the foundations of the earth,
then I was beside him, like a master workman,
and I was daily his delight,
rejoicing before him always

A Beautiful Mess (The one where I was ugly.)

The lighting in an airplane bathroom is not kind.  Neither is motherhood.  The haggard reflection of an unshowered woman with vomit down the front of her shirt, purple circles under her eyes, and a squirming two year old under her arm stared back at me blankly from the mirror.

An hour earlier I was feeling a little melodramatic rolling through the terminal after an exhausting week of time change, sick kids, and long days full of activity (aka “vacation”).   Finally heading home, my arms and elbows were full of bags and children as our family moved awkwardly through the busy airport. I could not help but notice the business women, wearing heels and packing light.  Some of them sat in cafes, alone, with a glass of wine and business at hand. “I used to be like you once, business women.” I thought.  “I was beautiful and important.  You would simply cry if you knew how little separates you from this encumbered mess walking by.”

I’m sure some of those women were actually loving moms who had seen their own fair share of late nights and yoga pants; but in that moment I felt jealous of their solitude, beauty, and professionalism.  I finally got to my gate and squeezed my awkward mess of diaper bags and clinging children through the narrow walking aisle of the plane. The flight was very hard.

That’s when I ended up face to face with the reflection of the worn woman in the mirror.  That gross little airplane bathroom became the place where this blessed, happy mom who adores her children and loves playing with bubbles and sidewalk chalk was ready to give it all up. That blank stare from the greasy girl who couldn’t even go pee by herself really got me.  People used to say I was pretty.  

I was praying my way through that entire flight starting from my flashes of jealousy and insecurity in the terminal.  Painfully, my feelings of being “unseen and unheard” felt amplified by Gods silence over those hours.  I couldn’t kick the ache in my heart that I had become an unattractive, unimportant woman.

We made it home.  Barely.

I finally got a few precious moments to myself, so I took out my Bible Study homework.  30 minutes later I was on the floor, bawling my eyes out and laughing with God over His “silence” and all of that vomit. 

Here’s what I learned that changed my life:

•      I want to be beautiful because that’s how God made me.
•          I am beautiful.
•          Love (even when it looks like vomit) is beautiful.
•          True Beauty is Messy.

I want to be beautiful because that’s how God made me.

I feel like on the subject of beauty, inner beauty gets a lot of time (Proverbs 31:30, 1 Peter 3:3-4). I understand that those purple circles under my eyes are “beautiful” in that abstract way of symbolizing the hours I was up rocking my child the night before.  I still hate them.  I still want a shower. 

I’m so glad that it isn’t shallow to want to be beautiful.  God created beauty, He created humans to appreciate physical and natural beauty (SOS 4:1), and has destined me to one day be a beautiful bride in heaven.  Of course my heart longs for that.  The problems only start when I look for anyone other than God to affirm my beauty.

I am beautiful.

Thankfully, God affirms my beauty any chance I ask Him. He died to be with me, his love for me is etched across the history of the universe.  There is a prophetic story about a royal wedding in the Psalms that points to the day when we will be the bride of our King in Heaven.  The stunning bride to be and her entire wedding party enter the palace with joy and gladness.  She has been told, “The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor Him, for he is your Lord.” (Psalm 45:11).

Before this day is over, you walk over to your bathroom mirror.  Allow the reflections of any unscrubbed showers or cluttered vanities to remain in the background.  Look that woman staring back at you in the eye.  You tell her: “The King is enthralled by your beauty; honor Him, for He is your Lord”. 

Take time in prayer to ask God if you are beautiful.  Allow all of the hurtful things people have said, negative images swirling in your mind, or lies of being ugly and worthless to surface.  Ask God to sweep them away like a cloud so that you can find your most beautiful reflection in His eyes alone.

Love (even when it looks like vomit) is beautiful.

One day we get to be brides again.  God has been planning this wedding feast for ages and has every last detail perfected (Revelation 19:6-8).  Our dress is being sewn together as I type, bright linen white and clean made possible by the ultimate sacrifice of love (Isaiah 1:18).  The linen itself is “the righteous acts of the saints” (Revelation 19:8). 

We won’t contribute anything borrowed or blue to our heavenly gown, but when we choose righteousness in the form of love we are weaving eternal threads into our own beauty in heaven.  When I hold my (vomiting) child close because I choose to honor God in my motherhood, serve without complaining, and love someone else more than myself that is not inner beauty- it is eternal beauty.

True beauty is messy. 

Jesus came to “give us a crown of beauty instead of ashes” (Isaiah 61:3). 

It isn’t until we look at our heads (possibly in the mirror of an airplane bathroom) and see the messy ashes of grieving our lost selves, youthful beauty, or sense of importance that we can truly appreciate what it means for the Prince of Heaven to place a crown on our heads and say “Marry me, my darling. I am enthralled by your beauty.”

When the Going Gets Good, the Grieved get Scared

Do you ever find yourself indulging in nightmarish speculation?  My morbid little mind often wanders into dark spaces that it doesn't belong- imagining the worst when my husband is late coming home from work or I feel the slightest pain that I decide is cancer. I have actually stared at a dark ceiling at 3:27am deliberating how I would spend the life insurance money.

If you've ever experienced deep grief or loss, you almost certainly know what I am talking about.  For everyone else, do not judge this intimate view into a scarred soul.

There's something about the hard times that feel almost comfortable to me.  I've walked through grief and pain and disappointment.  My soul has seen the dawn of incredibly dark nights.  In that darkness I was writhing, but God was so intimately close to me I cold almost reach out and touch Him.  His voice so clear, his peace and presence so strong.  

Somewhere in this beautiful experience of knowing God as my rescuer I lost perspective of His love.  I decided that since the Bible talks so much about trials, persecution, and endurance that this life was something I had to endure.  I had new resolve and conviction that I could do that with the strength I had come to know from God.

Then the strangest thing happened. Life got good.  

And a stranger thing happened.  The more blessed I felt, the more scared I got.

My contentment and resolve began to falter.  Strange, isn't it?  When you have nothing to lose at emotional rock bottom there is a security not only in God's presence but in an absence of risk.  Suddenly I had people I loved, achievements that felt important, things I enjoyed and I became paranoid about losing them.

God isn't just strong enough to get us through the bad times.  He's strong enough, good enough, and just ENOUGH to get us through life.

Paul puts it like this:

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.- Philippians 4:12-13

Usually people emphasize that through God's grace we can persevere through times of need, hunger, or want.  I'm most encouraged that I can be content when "fed" and "living in plenty".

I can do it because God gives me strength.  Strength to resist the temptation to worry.  Strength to enjoy and fully experience my blessings with gratitude for God who gave them to me.  Strength to let my heart attach itself. Strength to trust Him that he is not waiting to trick me, teach me a lesson, or torture me by taking everything away. Strength to have hope in His love.

Even though God was so loving toward me in my grief, anxiety wells inside me when I think of going back to that painful place of loss.  Paul gives us the secret to his full contentment with God regardless of circumstances a few verses earlier:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 4:6-7

So when things are bad, pray.  When things are GOOD...pray!  

Instead of ruminating in your anxiety, refuse the temptation to "take control" of an imaginary situation you do not have grace from God to experience- because it isn't real.  Lay your fears, mistrust, and worry at the feet of Jesus. He will replace it with a perfect peace that will guard your heart from your own painful fixations.

Memorize Philippians 4:6-7 and recite it when you start to imagine that the creak in your hardwood floor is a psychopath invading your home.  

Surrender your mind and heart to Jesus, there is peace there. Peace and joy and FREEDOM to experience the blessings of life he loves to give you.  You will discover a whole new side of God's love when you surrender to Him when times are good.

***

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things - Philippians 4:8

Will all your worries add a single moment to your life? - Matthew 6:27

The Beauty of Discontentment

There is a philosophy that says we can experience joy and contentment if we simply accept our lives as they are and focus on the positive.  It's just not true.  You don't have to feel guilty when counting your blessings doesn't make you feel better.  It never will. It's time to embrace our discontentment instead of shoving it to the side and thinking "thankful thoughts".

5 Reasons Discontentment is Good for Us:

1. Being discontent reminds us that we need God.

Nothing reminds us that we need God like a feeling of actual need.  There are so many beautiful prayers in the Bible that come from places of pain, distress, and being overwhelmed.  Of feeling angst and aimlessness.  God is there.  In those dark places.  He isn't hanging out with the people who are doing "okay", he is chasing after the heart that has sunk so far down it needs RESCUE.  That is what our savior specializes in: saving.

2. Our anxiety creates room for God's peace. 

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

Thankfulness has a role here, but it is the how not the what.  We approach God with thanksgiving, but also with anxiety!  The thankfulness isn't what produces peace.  God's peace is a gift we receive when we need Him, only He has peace that transcends understanding that can wash over our souls to guard our hearts.

3.  Discontentment can be the courage to say something needs to change.

Good intentions to invest in our marriage simply fell victim to tight budgets, overbooked schedules, and sheer exhaustion.  I told myself it was alright.  Love is a choice.  Although I have a husband I can be thankful for, I have officially decided I am NOT content with rarely having quality time with him.  Date night was born.

Do not talk yourself into being thankful for a life that could benefit from change.  There is an element of mothering young children that will always feel short on time, money and sleep.  Instead of being content with martyrdom, consider how you might make small changes with a big difference.  Once you've poured all of your anxiety at God's feet, ask Him for some practical guidance (James 1:5)

4. Discontentment mean's I'm not perfect.  (Shocker.)

There is a real temptation for me to fall into the "Count your Blessings" trap.  It has a lure of positivity, control, and self-determination that all appeal to me.  Realizing that two small children can break me to my knees and create an absolute dependence on God is humbling in an uncomfortable way.

I have to be the real can't-handle-it me to truly know the peace and joy of the real can-handle-it God.

5. Here comes the Holy Spirit.

I know that real joy and contentment is the outcome of the Spirit of God in my life, not a sentiment I can manufacture or create.  It's crazy for me to realize that God's Spirit lives in me.  There's still plenty of "me" in me.  The Spirit of God is loving and full of joy.  I'm invited to walk with Him and have Him transform my perspective and attitudes, but that is a decision I make moment by moment.  When I find my heart is full of angst and discontentment, it's an instant reminder that I am not allowing God's Spirit to guide me.  Those icky feelings of bitterness, angst, or jealousy remind me that life apart from Him is far more difficult and less desireable than the challenging life I strive for in surrender to Him.

***

Inspiration for the discontent and overwhelmed:

O God, listen to my cry!
Hear my prayer!
From the ends of the earth,
I cry to you for help
when my heart is overwhelmed.
Lead me to the towering rock of safety. Psalm 61:1-3

But as for me, I shall sing of Your strength;Yes, I shall joyfully sing of Your lovingkindness in the morning,For You have been my stronghold And a refuge in the day of my distress. O my strength, I will sing praises to You;For God is my stronghold, the God who shows me lovingkindness. Psalm 59:16-17

In my distress I called upon the Lord,And cried to my God for help;He heard my voice out of His temple,And my cry for help before Him came into His ears. Psalm 18:6

She, greatly distressed, prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly. 1 Samuel 1:10

Daddy's Little Helper

My heart leaped in my chest.  She chose ME.  I asked my 2 year old Olivia if she wanted to watch Curious George or come help mommy sweep the kitchen.

Let's be clear.  Olivia and her little red broom are not really helpful (observe the empty dustpan).  She spends most of her time wildly sweeping the crumbs I've gathered back under the cupboards.  

I didn't ask her to help me sweep so that she could clean the kitchen for me.  It was an invitation to spend time with me.  I hope that as I tell her aloud how to start in the corners and make little piles she will figure it out by the millionth time, years from now.  I hope that she learns a heart of working hard with a smile (and loud music).  Mostly I just think it's adorable when she uses the teeny red broom I gave her to try to be just like mommy.

Then it clicked.  I am "Daddy's little helper" in the Kingdom of God.  

I get confused about doing God's work because of the analogy of workers in a field that is used in the Bible.  It feels like I am busting my heart out sweating in the field, accomplishing rows of planting or harvesting, while the "master" sits in his big comfortable house.  I think that I am working hard to show what I have accomplished to God one day in heaven.  I think that I am a warrior, a worker, a woman to whom much has been given and who bears a great responsibility of stewardship.

Nothing could be further from the truth.  I am a baby with a tiny broom.

My calling to the work of God is an invitation to be with Him, to learn from Him, to work alongside Him as he accomplishes great things.  He uses another analogy about working in the kingdom of God that explains it beautifully.

Matthew 11:28-30
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke on you and learn from me, because I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and my load is not hard to carry.”

When a young ox was being trained, they would put him on the yoke of an older more experienced ox, to walk along side him.  By being tied to the other ox, he would learn how to do the work by doing it.  God isn't putting a light yoke on us, He is inviting us to join Him like an ox joins another closely on a yoke.  He promises that He is strong and knows what He's doing, so it will be easy for us.

I know it's oxen, but it's pretty intimate isn't it?  It looks incredibly annoying for the strong ox to have the young ox pulling the opposite direction.  I can hardly believe the God of the universe has invited me to be tied together with Him.  To learn from Him by shadowing closely.  To walk along side of Him as He in His strength and wisdom accomplishes great things, and to some how think of ourselves as a "team".

I couldn't imagine how God would WANT to do this, until I look at my little Livs holding up her empty dustpan so proudly.

It's so unhelpful, but so beautiful. I'm so thankful for the time I get to spend with her.  I appreciate her effort and am incredibly proud of her- not for her accomplishment or contribution to cleaning the kitchen, but despite the fact that there was none.

God doesn't want us to work FOR His kingdom.  He wants us to work WITH Him, with the tools He gave us.  To learn, to build relationship, and to try. 

Are you working for God or with Him?  Think of the ways you are leading, serving, or volunteering.  You'll know if you are doing the work with God because your relationship with Him will be getting deeper in trust, dependence, and mindset- not to mention He will be doing the heavy lifting!

Do you feel further from God than you would like to? He is inviting you to walk closely with him in his work.  Pray and ask Him to show you where you can work together with Him so that you can spend meaningful time with Him, learn from Him, and grow closer in your relationship. Consider how you can act in love alongside Him.

Daddy's working on a BIG and BEAUTIFUL project, girls.  Let's "help" Him out.

Moms on a Mission: Reclaiming our Calling

Do you long for God to use your life in exciting ways but feel totally stuck in your role as a mom?  No time, no energy, and no consistency made it seem impossible for me to feel like I was doing much more than surviving the day; let alone doing something big for God.  It didn't feel like my gifts or talents fit into the schedules of any of the ministries at church anymore.  It has taken me a looong time to understand my calling as a mom.  There were several failed attempts along the way:

I remember sitting at a conference when a 20-something got up to talk about her AMAZING call to Africa, where she literally held women’s hands to lead them out of slavery.  I sat there and thought, “I missed out.” I was married, had a mortgage, and was nursing a newborn.  I felt so useless.  I had no freedom to go on an extreme adventure for God.  Maybe I could give some money to this girl who could do exotic and life-changing ministry while I was at home changing diapers.   I thought, maybe that is my boring calling- to be a steward of God’s money to fund people with good callings.

Nope.

I remember driving my car with a gallon size Ziploc bag open under my mouth.  I had one of those “super fun” pregnancies where I literally did not know the moment I would start vomiting uncontrollably, only that it would certainly come.  I prayed that the baby inside of me would be “worth it”.  That God would use them mightily.  I thought, maybe this is my horrible calling- to sacrifice everything to raise up a godly child who will impact future generations.

No Again.

I remember studying the life of David, who was a shepherd and a servant for 32 years before he took his rightful place as anointed king.  I thought, maybe this is my calling- to sit on the sidelines for a season of servanthood so that some day in the distant future I will be humble enough to accept my REAL calling that will be beautiful, exciting, and involve leadership.

Wrong.

Our calling is never someone else’s calling.  It’s not even our children’s calling. We are definitely not called to sit around and do nothing until some giant opportunity we aren’t even preparing our hearts for magically presents itself.  We are called as moms to the same ministry as every other daughter of God.  To make disciples (Matthew 28:19) and to bear fruit (John 15:1-2). 

Stop for a minute.  If you feel like you can’t live a joy-filled, powerful life for God as a mighty and impactful force in his kingdom while you are nursing a baby every 3 hours, chasing a toddler, or driving carpool- then pray with me.

“God.  I want to follow you.  I feel stuck.  Show me the calling you have for me that is supposed to be uniquely mine.  That will fill me with purpose and joy and change lives for your glory.  Amen”.

Now read with me. 

1 Corinthians 13:1-3 “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging symbol.  If I have the gift of prophesy an can fathom all mysteries and knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move the mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.  If I give all I posses to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.”

Or to paraphrase: If I can teach like Beth Moore, but don’t have love- it’s meaningless.  If I live like Francis Chan or Bob Goff, and give everything to the poor, but don’t do it in love- it’s meaningless.  If I go to Africa to save orphans like Katie Davis, but don’t have love- it means nothing.

It is not about how big or different or radical we can make our adventure for God.  It’s not what we do or how many people we get to show up somewhere or listen to us that makes our work for God powerful, important, or meaningful- it’s LOVE.

Why? 1 John 4:8 “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”

Because God is love.  His Spirit of love is what makes us different from the world around us.  His Spirit is the breath, and life, and power of any meaningful, powerful, interesting calling we could ever hope to answer.

We have all been gifted in different ways.  All of our life experiences and talents and personalities coupled with supernatural abilities that God’s Spirit gives us lead us to do and to love to do different things. 

Romans 12:3-8 “For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.”

We each have different gifts, and some are even more gifted than others. You may not ever have someone else’s gift, calling or ministry…but you do have yours.  There is no room for jealousy here.  When you turn your nose up at your gift or your calling, you are insulting the giver of both. Always use your gift at every opportunity in love (1 Peter 4:10) and realize you may not be ready for more at this moment in time- “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought.” 

Did you know that your gift was given to you by Jesus Christ?  He is so wise, and he gave it to you thoughtfully.  He gave it to you specifically for a VERY important reason:

“to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.”- Ephesians 4:12

Our gifts were meant to cause UNITY and maturity, never jealousy or discontentment.  We are all supposed to work together as a single team, like one body, to reach the fullness of being like Christ.  Judging from the church today, I’d say we are not all using our gifts in love.  Let’s change that, starting with us.

Join in the Mommas Revolution.  Don’t look at the four walls around you as a prison, make your home a temple for the presence of God and his Holy Spirit.  Love your husband and kids in a sacrificial way that displays the glory of God’s character to everyone who knows you (1John 4:12).  Be thankful for your calling and the space God has carved out for you to use your gift.  It is the perfect size for you, your faith and your gift at this moment (Psalm 16:6). 

What would happen if instead of wishing you were in charge, you used your momma eyes to look around and see who needed a little encouragement?  If instead of standing on stage looking into a backlit crowd of shadowy silhouettes you let yourself sit in the back and be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and took notice of who was insecure, hurting, doubting, or learning and took a chance to love them?  If instead of having your headshot on a popular blog or book cover, you just let that pretty little face of yours be approachable to all the other moms on the playground, with no makeup, picking up screaming kids from the nursery or sneaking a third cup of coffee?

Love would happen.  Grace would happen.  You have your gift.  You have the Holy Spirit to teach you how and show you when to use it.  THAT is your calling. To use your gift RIGHT NOW, in love, to make disciples and bear fruit.

Girls.  God does have a dream for our lives.  It’s a big one.  It’s beautiful and it is custom fit to our hearts, passions, weaknesses and strength.  He has had it in mind from the time he created us, called us, and everything he has been teaching us along the way.  I wish you love and joy and peace as you learn to listen to him and walk in the true passion of your spirit to HIS GLORY.